• Staci Morey, LCSW

I Love You, But Please Leave Me Alone - 5 Steps to Deal With Mom Guilt

Updated: Jun 23, 2020

Have you ever felt like you were a “bad mom” because you were dying for a break from your kid? I’m here to tell you you’re not. Good moms need breaks too! Being a parent is exhausting. It is a 24/7 job. It is work. When you are at a job they are legally required to give you a break after you have worked so many hours. So what’s up with the mom-guilt around wanting or needing a break from your kid (even if they are “well behaved”!)? How can we be kinder to ourselves and less judgmental of meeting our needs?

I wish I had a magic answer for you but I don’t. There is (sadly) no quick fix to moving through guilt or being less judgmental on ourselves. It is a consistent effort on our part to work on having compassion for ourselves. Here is an “easy” 5 step process to help you take that much needed time to yourself:

Step 1. Leave your child with someone 

Step 2. Feel the guilt and discomfort 

Step 3. Acknowledge and accept the guilt and discomfort 

Step 4. Remind yourself good moms need breaks too! 

Step 5. Return home and see that your child is still in one piece and still loves you

Taking time for yourself is good for your children to see! So much of what our children learn is by watching us. We can teach our children how to take care of themselves by taking care of ourselves. We don't even have to leave the house to do it. So go on! Go get the haircut, take the extra long bubble bath, do the workout, whatever it is that you want to do that will help you fill your own cup! If you don't have childcare then the housework or whatever it is can wait. Take some time for you after your kid goes to bed to read, meditate, whatever you want - just do it. Remember, we can't give to others when our own cup is empty!

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